tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3529725084811715233.post1129075012150615292..comments2024-03-26T16:31:13.865-07:00Comments on Mark Lawrence: Page 1 critique - "Nescada" by Knicky LaurelMark Lawrencehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16877925828353073272noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3529725084811715233.post-18263071561527656272015-11-11T16:29:59.472-08:002015-11-11T16:29:59.472-08:00Grimstone 360. Even established authors can fall ...Grimstone 360. Even established authors can fall in love with their own creations. You might apply such criticism to Robert Jordan, or George R R Martin, for example. On the other hand, finely written prose can be very rewarding and inspiring to read. It's just a not-so-simple question of getting it right.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3529725084811715233.post-60897456497883244192015-11-11T06:01:24.659-08:002015-11-11T06:01:24.659-08:00I've just released a book and was asked by a f...I've just released a book and was asked by a friend to send Mark the first page. Truth be told, I was a little nervous to do so. Not intentionally putting him on a pedestal or anything, but he's a somebody and I'm a... well, still trying to get there. Anyway, i was going somewhere with this. Oh yeah, I wrote over the last ten years around three, maybe four hundred thousand words. I binned more than what i kept, and a lot of that was over-descriptive scenes (aside from redundant, 'not-contributing-to-the-story-progression' characters). It's easy to do. You pat yourself on the back for sounding really clever. It feels like you are being artistic, poetic; it is seriously rewarding and feeds your ego to no end. But it makes the writing unpalatable, and for those that do not view your work as their baby, it's boring. I struggled to read Knicky Laurel intro, maybe because i needed to be smarter to appreciate it. There are hugely successful books that i gave up on because they made me feel thick.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09882285230059848263noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3529725084811715233.post-26474367062316883492015-11-10T16:28:22.726-08:002015-11-10T16:28:22.726-08:00I don't mind a bit of poetry in the prose, som...I don't mind a bit of poetry in the prose, something enigmatic that hints at a mystery. Other than that, I would suggest Xaeviere Moigersavoi's POV as the point of introduction to the scene. Putting us in the head of a single character gives more focus and definition, and a viewpoint we can identify with. Perhaps we can form a better impression of Taerah Talavereis through his eyes? Finally, does anyone notice a doorknob? I honestly don't know.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3529725084811715233.post-40559083624702081012015-11-10T14:11:38.300-08:002015-11-10T14:11:38.300-08:00My first drafts were way worse. I recruited total ...My first drafts were way worse. I recruited total strangers to beta read and begged them to rip it apart, recruited an editor and he bled red ink all over it, in the end their merciless beating made me a better writer. <br /><br />I think one mistake all beginners make is going by vision too much and not utilizing the other senses. I think it would be more dramatic if the writer showed how the ice blue doorknobs felt cold to the touch. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16395877246343368097noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3529725084811715233.post-20240180044615416912015-11-10T11:29:08.662-08:002015-11-10T11:29:08.662-08:00I found the sentences too long and convoluted - I ...I found the sentences too long and convoluted - I had to re-read some several times to make sense of them. I burst out laughing when I came to "taking perfunctory note of their blue diamond knobs". That sentence made me wonder if this was a wind up. <br />Agnes Conwaynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3529725084811715233.post-72509794815477854032015-11-10T09:25:22.876-08:002015-11-10T09:25:22.876-08:00Don't know about the mechanics, know about the...Don't know about the mechanics, know about the feeling. Don't care how a writer does it, if he does it I read everything he writes. OldeYellerCatOlde Yeller Cathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08778540675356850518noreply@blogger.com